New Year, Better Me

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Wow, I can't believe it is already 2019! That sounds so crazy!
I felt like 2018 flew by, and as usual there were so many things that I wanted to accomplish that I didn't get done. That being said, I did a little thinking and decided that this year I'm not going to make a giant list of unattainable and outlandish goals and restrictions for myself. It always ends up overwhelming me and three weeks into the year I've already given up. Anyone else? lol

The things I want to keep at the forefront of 2019 are growth, self care, and accomplishment. I heard of someone recently who picks a word to live by at the beginning of every year, and I love that idea so much that I decided to do it. I thought long and hard about how I could pick just one tiny word for an entire year. After lots of thought and several hours on dictionary.com ? I found my word.  
My word for 2019 is INTENTIONAL.

I want everything I do to be on purpose. I want to be intentional about how I spend my time, what I'm listening to, who I'm hanging out with, and how I plan to get where I want to go. Most of the time, things that you really want don't just "happen." We have to be intentional about MAKING them happen. Life has taken me on a crazy journey this past year, and as difficult as it seemed in the midst of it all, I am so thankful for how much it pushed me to grow and learn about myself. The past few months I have HAD to be intentional to make things happen that I needed to happen. I'm telling myself that there are no excuses or cop outs to reaching my dreams this year! 

I know I said I wasn't making a huge list of outlandish goals this year, but here are some things I'd like to intentionally work towards. These probably seem vague but I think giving myself a little flexibility in my goals may make them more attainable :)

SELF IMPROVEMENT
I am the world's worst at being selfish. You may think that's a great thing, but sometimes I find myself spending so much time on pleasing others that I forget about myself and my own needs.
This year I want to say NO more to things I don't actually want to do or things I know I shouldn't overwhelm myself with. Does anyone else find themselves saying yes when you KNOW you meant no? It's always a challenge for me because I hate confrontation, but it's not about being rude or making someone mad, it's just respecting yourself enough to set some healthy boundaries. 
I want to learn more about myself and increase the depth of my knowledge by reading more books this year. The past few months I have been reading quite a bit and it is SO motivating and inspiring. It has made me realize so many things about myself and my own experiences. It gives me new perspective, and I'm all about it. I'm going to attempt to read one book a month! Let me know if y'all want me to share what books I'm reading :)
Lastly, I am going to work on loving myself. Sounds so cliche, I know, but it's often something we all forget to do. The way I plan to love myself is to stop criticizing  and comparing myself so much. We all have insecurities, we are all flawed, NONE of us are perfect, so let's embrace those things. Let's improve the things we can about ourselves (ex: I'm super insecure about how shy I am sometimes, so instead of just telling myself how much I dislike that quality, I am going to challenge it by being more social and figuring out how to overcome it) and start appreciating the things we can't change. I don't want to waste my life wishing I were someone or something else. I want to be the best version of ME! 

CREATIVE OUTLETS
I would consider myself a fairly creative person. I like to create whether that be an outfit, or baking a cake, it inspires me. When I first started my blog I felt super inspired and passionate because it was simply a hobby. Now that it has become more than a hobby, I've found myself occasionally feeling overwhelmed and uninspired. It started feeling like I HAVE to post and HAVE to answer emails and HAVE to come up with new content, which can take the fun out of things. But that happens. This past week though I reminded myself of why I started my blog, and where I was going wrong. This year I want my blog be a creative outlet again and not just a responsibility. My creativity can then inspire YOUR creativity, which is always the goal :) I'm telling myself that it's OKAY if there's a day that I don't have content to post, or I don't want to get on IG stories and talk about my favorite new hairspray. Life happens and that's OKAY!   
I also want to create something of my own. I have been thinking for sometime about creating Hey Pretty merchandise. I know exactly what it is that I want to make, but for whatever reason I have had a total block to accomplish it. I have all the pieces to make it, but I feel scared/nervous/to go for it. I think a lot of it is being a perfectionist and feeling like it has to come out perfect. Another part is fear of rejection- thinking will anyone every like or want this? But since this is the year of being intentional, I am going to get it done, one way or the other, and push my fears aside! I'm hopeful you all will be just as excited about it as I am ?

WORK TOWARDS BALANCE
This might be my biggest challenge at the moment. My schedule has changed and I have less time now to prepare content for Hey Pretty. A lot of you have asked if I work besides my blog and yes, I do. I am currently working towards getting my Realestate license while balancing a job, a marketing company I own with my brother,  my blog, and whatever time I have left for a social life, lol ? it's been so stressful lately to be completely honest, so I want to figure out a healthy system to try to balance it all. This might be where learning to say no helps me out, haha! I also would love to get back into a consistent workout routine as well! I don't have this part all figured out yet, so I'll keep you all posted ;)

CHALLENGE MYSELF
You've heard me say this a million times, but I am quite the introvert. I actually really struggle with social anxiety. It's been something I have dealt with ever since I was a little girl. I used to be extremely shy growing up (like to the point where one of my teachers asked my mom if I was mute... ??‍♀️), and I finally learned how to at least fake it by the time I was in high school. Most people that meet me probably don't realize how shy I am because I've learned a few coping mechanisms, but if they could only see me on the inside!!! I am a ball of nerves in social situations, and sometimes I start thinking that I'm coming across as awkward or that whoever I'm talking to notices that I am nervous and that just makes me MORE nervous. Most of my life my way of coping was to just not put myself in many social situations, but from experience that just makes it worse! I'm finding that the more I socialize the easier it is getting. This year I am looking forward to pushing past this anxiety. I want to challenge myself to be more social, to say yes to activities, and to make new friends! I feel like you're never too old to add to your friend group ;)
Just telling you guys all of that leads me to my next goal of being more open and raw with people. Because I'm a little bit shy I think I tend to be nervous opening up to people or sharing how I really feel for fear of judgement. In the past, I've had a few people say they think I'm stuck up or act like I'm too good, when in all honestly I'm just shy ? So that being said I want to work on being more open, less standoffish, and really let you guys see me and my life for what it really is :)


Lastly, I want to thank each and every one of you. From the bottom of my heart I am SO thankful for you all, and couldn't do what I love to do without you. Thank you for sticking with me through my journey. You all are such inspiration to me. I mean it. I'm so happy that we are on this rollercoaster of life and growth together! 
Happy New Year my loves! Wishing you the very best!

Until Next Time,

Kayley